Obsess much?

Ok, I'll admit it. Freely and without shame. I am obsessed.

I am obsessed with Pirates of the Caribbean.

I have watched the third installment, At Worlds End, at least four times in the last week - start to finish, front to back, and in one case, back to front.

I can probably recite Curse of the Black Pearl for you verbatim. I'm working on memorizing the other two. Rest assured if I had the money to, I'd be camped out at Disney's Castaway Cay for the next six months whilst I memorized every inch of the Flying Dutchman.

I have dreams where I am as beautiful as Kiera Knightly and I am the lucky girl who won the role of Elizabeth Swann. The incredibly lucky girl who gets to make out with BOTH of these delicious, mouth watering, wet dream inducing wonders of nature.

What woman in her right mind would turn THAT down? Certainly not me. However, we all know that I am no Keira Knightly, and I'm not ever going to have the chance to star opposite those amazingly sculpted Gods of the Seas.

So I keep watching, and I keep dreaming. What harm could this MINOR obsession cause? None right?

You keep telling yourself that luv....

Umm.. Just ignore the the voices....I try to....

I think I'll make my next movie party one with a pirates and wenches theme. All three movies - one blissful night.

On second thought - maybe I should make that my next Saturday alone. After all....who wants to share?

Stay sane inside insanity ~ and never forget your towel.

Still under house arrest

Ok, so that's not completely true. I am ALLOWED to leave the house - I'm just not allowed to do it alone. And legally, I still can't drive until I'm cleared by my cardiologist. At least that's the way I understand it. So, here I sit - surfing, watching tv, and doing light housework until my stress test on June 2. Hardly anyone calls, and no one stops by. I get emails. But that's about it.

I'M BORED. I'm so bored my brain has atrophied into zilch-ness. I read blogs (and I HAVE been reading them guys), but I don't comment. And sometimes the content doesn't even register in my head. I'm going stir crazy, and I can't even come up with a creative sentence or two to describe THAT. I have four stories on the go, including one that I was challenged to by my editor, and I haven't made headway on a single one.

I can't do any heavy lifting, so that leaves out laundry and most housework. I can't walk on my own in case I experience chest pains - at least until MY STRESS TEST. This is what's going to kill me - the stress BEFORE the stress test. And that test is going to take five FREAKING HOURS. I hope to God they're not expecting me to stay on the treadmill that long. I just did an exersize stress test for my cardiac wellness program yesterday and I was only able to stay on it 8 minutes. Of course, they increase the speed and incline every 20 seconds, so that makes it a bit different from my treadmill here at home. Plus I was in lousy shape before this attack occurred.

Of course, it's all for my health, and I realize that. But I didn't realize that having so much time on my hands was going to be so boring. You know we all have those days when we're sitting at our desk at work, and we think of a dozen things at home that need to be done that we could be doing instead of being at work. I had those days often. Now I have been home all this time, and only two of the projects I've been wanting to do got done because of the limitations on my movement. So once I get back to work, I'm going to have more of those moments, and it's going to drive me batty.

I'm also thinking of quitting my job. Not my security job - which I love more than any other job I've ever had before - but the boring day job. Truth of the matter is, it's not paying enough for me to invest in my future, and I need to be somewhere I can move up in the company. Right now, there is nowhere for me to go. So I started thinking of where I'd want to go with my life, and all I can think is that I want to TRAVEL. My best friend is the same age I am, but has been with her company for ten years. She is single, she owns her own car, and now her own condo, and she's been halfway around the world and back again. Currently, the biatch is in Poland, after being in Scotland. (And I say biatch with all the love in the world - we've been BFF's since we were five). I should have followed her lead in high school - not worry so much about being popular and instead go to class. SIGH. Ah well, hind sight is always 20/20 ain't it?

I think I might have gone overboard on my sleeping pills last night - I don't think I needed the two that I took. One probably would have been sufficient. But I'm not sleeping - especially since I've had to give up weed. My brain never shuts down, and I'm always thinking. Most nights it's 2am and I'm still staring at the clock. So I took two pills cuz I didn't sleep the night before. Now I'm completely groggy and it's taking forever to write this entry.

I should probably lie down.

Until later kiddies. MWAH - giant smooches and snogs. Love you all.

Stay sane inside insanity ~ and never forget your towel.

Fishnets and corsets and muscles....OH MY

WARNING: Contains adult content. Paul, I have to apologize now honey.

This is a clip of The Rocky Horror Show from CanStage's production last year. The guy playing the lead is a wonderful actor named Adam Brazier. Adam and I worked together - so to speak - when he was appearing as Skye in Mamma Mia at the Royal Alex many moons ago (seems like a lifetime). I know that Tim Curry is the original Frank and that NO ONE can do it better than him, but this guy is sexay HOT in his fishnets and corset. This is Tim's signature song - Sweet Transvestite. It's the second best version I've ever heard - Tim's being the first (and Paul, honey, that's why I had to apologize. LOL).



Ladies, get out the drool bib....

ENJOY!!!!

Stay sane inside insanity ~ and never forget your towel.

AARRRGGGHHH - again....

Don't know if everyone else is going through this or not, but Hotmail is having serious problems y'all, so I can't get to your messages.

*grumble grumble*

That sucks when you're at home and you're secondary form of entertainment is your email.

On a more interesting note, I had THE MOST wonderful and bizarre dream about myself and Monsieur Hicks last night (sorry Dana baby - you weren't there). I shall attempt to reconstruct and recount if possible.

Stay sane inside insanity ~ and never forget your towel.

You never expect it to happen to you

Well, all the warning signs were there. My weight was up, my cholesterol levels were ridiculously high, and my activity was non-existant.

So it should have come as no surprise when on Monday morning, my left jaw and left chest were in a lot of pain. I thought it would just go away and proceeded to get ready for work, as I always do. My cousin knocked on the door, and off we went. All the while, the pain hadn't abated, and it certainly hadn't left. I mumbled to her something along the lines of getting the paramedics to check me out when I made it into work that night for the hockey game. But when I got to work, I realized that something was very, VERY wrong and I had my boss call the ambulance.

Sure enough, I was having a minor heart attack. It was so serious that I didn't even feel any embarassment when they lifted my shirt and exposed my disgusting flabby midriff. All I could do was cry and beg and plead with them to save my life. During the ambulance ride, my oxygen came out twice and it caused me to panic. When I was wheeled in to emergency, I was put immediately to the head of the line. My father was the first to arrive, being the only one I was able to contact. I could have had my boss call Rod, but there was no one to take his class, and there would have been no way for him to show up immediately. So when dad showed up, I handed him my cell phone and asked him to call Rod at work, and one of my best friends Terry, who was scheduled to pick me up at work to take me to the hockey game. Soon, I was wheeled into a room, where my clothing and jewelery was removed and I answered the same questions over and over again.

After seeing two doctors, I was taken into surgery where I had a procedure called an angioplasty done. They made an incision in my right groin and inserted a tube up to my heart. They injected a dye to see where the blockage was, and then when it was found, a balloon was inserted into my artery and inflated to press the blockage against the artery walls. Then two mesh metal tubes were inserted into my artery to ensure the blockage wouldn't retract. Unfortunately, the incision made in my groin didn't close up properly and resulted in a hemotoma - I think it means the blood just kept circulating. Anyway, it resulted in a disgusting, swollen bruise which is incredibly painful.

By the time I was wheeled into my room in CCU, I was on morphine, nitroglycerin, and gravol. I was doped up and just SO thankful to be alive.

I've had well wishes from friends, and enemies that have said that while we weren't getting along, this was not something they ever would have wished on me (thank goodness huh?). I've had beautiful bouquets of flowers, wonderful wishes sent and friends sending all the love possible. My family is a fabulous support system, and they're all doing their best to make sure I stay on the straight and narrow.

But I still feel empty. And I don't know why.

But I was also terrified. No longer. I'm determined. I'm focused.

I'm not only going to get thinner, I'm going to be healthier. I will be stronger. I will be the best I can possibly be.

I'm only worried about one thing. What happens when the "newness" wears off? What happens when I get frustrated because I go back to WANTING to eat crap? Right now none of that appeals to me, but right now I still have the massive brusie on my leg to remind me of exactly what happened. What happens two or three months from now, when lethargy kicks in again and I don't want to cook, or exercise? What happens then?

I know everyone says that they'll kick my ass if they see me with crap in my hands, but I can still drive myself - or at least I'll be able to in a month. What happens if my will power collapses? What happens then?

I know - one day at a time. It's all I can ask for - it's all I can do.

And while I never expected it to happen to me, it did. So, if you are in the danger zone, PLEASE stop all detrimental actions immediately and head for the nearest vegetable stand. While it's ok to indulge once in awhile....make healthy your new habit. Please.

I couldn't stand for any of you to go through this.

Stay sane inside insanity ~ and never forget your towel.

Message in A Bottle MEME

Well, I was tagged for this inspirational meme by the originator Wavy (or was it Mimi?) Anyway, it's a good question. If you could leave one message to the world, what would it be? A favourite quote....a song lyric.....a joke.....

Whatever it is, here's your chance.

And since the Queen herself has tagged just about everyone in the blogosphere....I won't tag anyone BUT, will say that if you haven't done it yet, you should.

**Start Copy Here**
Here are the rules:
You are about to send a virtual Message In a Bottle across the Blog Ocean. Leave a message in the sand or on the bottle. Write anything you wish. Be a pirate or a poet. Serious or silly. Anonymous or not.

What message would you like to send out to the universe?

Message In A Bottle Meme

1. Compose a message to place in your virtual bottle
2. Right click and Save the graphic below
3. Use a graphics program of your choice to place the message on the picture
4. Post the meme and these rules on your blog
5. Return your "Message In a Bottle" to Mimi via email ~ mimiwrites2005 at yahoo.com, and then head to her site and leave her a comment that you're done. IF YOU WANT YOUR MESSAGE TO BE ANONYMOUS PLEASE SAY SO.
6. Tag a minimum of five people - or your entire blogroll - to do the same. Notify them of the tag.

Your virtual bottle will remain afloat in the blogosphere ocean for all blogernity (That's a Mimism for blog + eternity.)

Stay sane inside insanity ~ and never forget your towel.

DAMN YOU......!!!

*shaking fist at the sky*

Whom am I cursing out? Well, where to start today....

A) Warren. He works with me. He's a moron. He knows nothing, but for some reason, is a good sales person. So the boss (re: owner of the company, NOT the general manager who has to deal with him every day) loves him. His job is safe, and my job is to put up with him. It drives me nuts and on a daily basis, I am FORCED to put up with his stupid mistakes. Yes, I realize I could quit, but without another job, that's just stupid.

Which brings me to ....

B) whomever the genius was that decided we needed money to live. I HATE MY DAY JOB. I hate days - mornings suck ass and heaven help my kids when I have them -they're going to be vampires. If security paid better, I would definately be doing that full time. It's not saving the world, but you know, it's a job I really enjoy and love doing. Personally, if I could find a way to make money from home in my pyjamas (and that doesn't involve porn - so Matt, Bond...and the rest of y'all, get yer minds out of the gutter), I would do it. In fact, if I could find a way to make money reading blogs, I would SO love that. Because....

C) there's too many damn good blogs out there for us "bookies" (you know, like foodies only with books). Not the Vegas kind, so don't be calling me to place a bet on the Sens beating the Pens (well, it ain't gonna happen anyway). I LOVE to read, especially humorous, intelligent, heart warming content....oh all right. I love to read pretty much anything. As I've been heard to say several times, I'll read the the nutitional information onthe side of a ceral box if nothing else is available. I'll read my books over and over and over until they're dog-earred and need replacing. And I spend most of my down time at work reading blogs. So, finding a job where I read GOOD stuff all day long would be great. One where I read good stuff all day long and do it from home would be amazing because....

D) there's not enough damn hours in the day to plan and execute great dinners, do laundry, clean the bathroom, and manage to spend quality time with the hubby, not to mention do the security thing three or four nights a week. And then there's the having to visit the grandparents once a week, which isn't bad and I love them, but they're 81 and 87 respectively and they're SLOOOOOWWWW to do anything. So what should be a two hour visit turns into three or four sometimes. :S I'm also in the middle of three or four writing projects and I have a number of things that need to be done that are supposed to be at the head of that long list. :S And this all leads to....

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGHHHHHHHHHHH.

Me screaming and running around, arms flailing like the Tasmanian Devil on crack, my head spinning around like I'm Linda Blair, and my husband standing there clutching a syringe with 50 cc's of valium, and hawk handling gloves on so to protect himself from injury or harm.

Dear Lord...that kicks in quick. SIGH. I need help.

But first, I need sle......................zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Stay sane inside insanity ~ and never forget your towel.